Conflict Resolution Techniques for Leaders
By VICKY BROWN
Oh, it’s gonna happen. You’re going to have two of your team in conflict with one another. How can you tackle this? Well, here are a few conflict resolution techniques every leader needs to master.
Above everything else, you’re going to have to stay impartial. Why is it so important to stay neutral and avoid taking sides? Well, as a leader, your job isn’t to pick a winner in arguments. It’s to help your team figure things out together. And when you show you’re neutral, it creates an environment where everyone feels like they can speak up without worrying about getting on your bad side. And let me tell you, that’s golden when it comes to solving problems.
Now, I’ll be honest with you – staying impartial isn’t always easy. We’re all human, right? We’ve all got our own opinions. But here’s the trick: you’ve got to recognize those thoughts and then set them aside. Put on your leader hat and say, “Okay, personal feelings, you can sit this one out.”
When you’re in the middle of a conflict, really listen to everyone without judgment. Ask questions that don’t lean one way or the other. And for goodness sake, don’t start sharing your own views on the situation. It’s about being fair and showing integrity – and believe me, your team will notice and respect you for it.
Now, I don’t want you to think this means you get to sit back and just watch the drama unfold. No way! Being impartial doesn’t mean being a passive bystander. You’ve still got to steer the ship, just without picking a side. Make sure everyone gets their turn to speak. If things start getting heated or going off track, it’s your job to bring it back to center. Help your team focus on the facts instead of getting lost in emotions. It’s a balancing act, for sure, but when you nail it? You’ll be amazed at how your team can come together and find solutions, all while keeping the peace. And in the end, isn’t that what great leadership is all about?
Next up – active listening. You’ve probably heard the term before, but what exactly is active listening? Well, it’s not just hearing the words coming out of someone’s mouth. It’s about really tuning in to what they’re saying – and what they’re not saying. It means giving your full attention to each person involved in the conflict. And I mean full attention. Put away your phone, close your laptop, and really focus on the person speaking. It’s amazing how much more you’ll pick up when you’re not trying to multitask (and let’s be honest, we’re all guilty of that sometimes).
But interesting fact – active listening isn’t just about being quiet while the other person talks. It’s way more involved than that. You’ve got to ask clarifying questions to make sure you’re really getting what they’re saying. And then – this is the part a lot of people miss – you need to reflect back what you’ve heard. It might feel a bit weird at first, like you’re playing some kind of corporate parrot, but trust me, it works wonders. Say something like, “So what I’m hearing is…” and then summarize what they’ve told you. This does two things: it shows the person you’re really listening, and it gives them a chance to correct any misunderstandings right then and there. And let me tell you, catching those misunderstandings early can save you a whole lot of headache down the road.
Use your problem-solving skills to get to the root of the issue. When it comes to conflicts, we need to dig a little deeper than usual.
So, what do I mean by digging deeper? Well, let’s face it – most conflicts aren’t just about what’s on the surface. You might have two team members arguing about a project deadline, but the real issue could be unclear communication, or different working styles, or even some underlying tension that has nothing to do with the project at all. Your job as a leader is to put on your detective hat and start investigating. Ask questions like, “When did this issue first start?” or “What do you think is really causing this disagreement?” Sometimes, people don’t even realize what’s really bothering them until you help them unpack it.
Now, once you’ve identified the root cause (or causes – because, let’s be real, it’s often more than one), then it’s time to start exploring solutions. This is your chance to get creative and collaborative. If the issue is larger than two people, you might bring the team together and start brainstorming. Encourage everyone to throw out ideas, no matter how wild they might seem at first. Sometimes the best solutions come from the craziest suggestions. And remember, the goal here isn’t just to solve the immediate problem, but to put measures in place that’ll prevent similar conflicts in the future.
Something that’s absolutely critical when you’re navigating conflicts in your business – keeping your eyes on the prize with a future-focused, solution-oriented approach. Oh, I know it’s tempting to rehash all the “he said, she said” drama, but trust me, that’s not going to get you anywhere.
When you’re future-focused, it’s all about steering the conversation away from blame and towards possibilities. Instead of asking, “Who messed up?”, try asking, “How can we make sure this doesn’t happen again?” It’s the difference between looking in the rearview mirror and looking through the windshield – one keeps you stuck in the past, while the other helps you move forward. And let’s be honest, in business, forward is always the direction we want to be moving!
Now, here’s the thing – this approach doesn’t mean you ignore what’s happened. No, you’ve got to acknowledge the issues that led to the conflict. But instead of dwelling on them, use them as stepping stones to build a better future. For example, if two team members are clashing over project responsibilities, don’t just focus on who did what wrong. Instead, guide the conversation towards creating clearer job descriptions or improving your project management process.
“… when you show you’re neutral, it creates an environment where everyone feels like they can speak up without worrying about getting on your bad side“
And let me tell you, this future-focused approach does wonders for team morale. When people see that conflicts are opportunities for improvement rather than blame games, they’re more likely to speak up about issues early on. Plus, it creates a culture of continuous improvement in your business. And isn’t that what we’re all aiming for? A business that keeps getting better and better, conflict after conflict?
Something that often gets overlooked but is absolutely crucial in conflict resolution – the follow-up. If you skip this step, then you’ve done all the work, but you won’t get the result you want!
But, what does a good follow-up look like? Well, it’s not just about sending a quick email saying “Are we all good?” Oh no, it’s much more than that. First off, you want to schedule check-ins with the involved parties. Maybe it’s a week after the resolution, then a month, then three months. During these check-ins, you’re not just asking if everything’s okay – you’re digging deeper. Ask questions like, “How is the new process working for you?” or “Have you noticed any improvements in communication since we last talked?” This shows your team that you’re genuinely invested in the long-term solution, not just in putting out fires.
And follow-ups aren’t just about making sure the agreed-upon solutions are happening. They’re also your early warning system for any resurgence of old issues. You know how sometimes you think you’ve fixed something, but then it pops up again like some sort of stubborn weed? Well, regular follow-ups help you spot those weeds before they take over your whole garden. And let’s be honest, it’s much easier to deal with a small issue than to wait for it to blow up into a full-blown conflict again. Plus, these follow-ups send a clear message to your team: we don’t just solve problems here, we make sure they stay solved. And that, my friends, is how you build a resilient, drama-free business culture. Now, isn’t that worth a few extra meetings?
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And finally, great leaders use a flexible approach to resolving conflicts. Because one size definitely does not fit all when it comes to solving problems.
After all, you wouldn’t use the same marketing strategy for every single product you sell, right? Of course not! You adapt based on what you’re selling, who you’re selling to, and a whole bunch of other factors. Well, conflict resolution works the same way. Sometimes you need to be direct and assertive, other times you need to step back and let your team work it out themselves. It’s all about reading the room and figuring out what approach will work best for this specific situation.
Now, how do you figure out which approach to use? Well, it’s all about context. Ask yourself: Who’s involved in this conflict? What’s their relationship like? What’s at stake here? Is this a quick decision that needs to be made, or do we have time to work through things slowly?
For example, if you’ve got two senior team members butting heads over a strategic decision, you might need to take a more hands-on, mediative approach. But if it’s a minor disagreement between junior staff about day-to-day operations, you might be better off encouraging them to work it out themselves (with you keeping an eye on things, of course).
And hey- sometimes you might need to switch up your approach mid-conflict. Yep, you heard me right! Maybe you start off thinking a collaborative approach is best, but then you realize things are getting too heated and you need to step in more assertively.
Being able to pivot like this, to adjust your style on the fly – that’s the mark of a truly skilled leader. It shows your team that you’re not just following a script, but you’re really tuned in to what’s happening and what they need. And let me tell you, that kind of flexibility and responsiveness? It builds trust like nothing else. So remember – when it comes to conflict resolution, be like water. Flow, adapt, and always find a way through. That’s how you turn conflicts into opportunities for growth.